Also

Disclaimer: I wrote my user profile when I was 12. I'm leaving it for the sake of nostalgia, although 80% of that shit is currently incorrect.

Moving swiftly forward.

Today my basketball team played against a school whose name I shall not mention. We will call them Lovidence Hall. Now, I am a generally peaceful person. I don't get in people's faces. On the field or on the court, however, this trait is dismissed. I am an extremely aggressive player. I'm not afraid to use my body as a weapon, even if it means falling down with them or getting extremely hurt.

Lovidence Hall is arguably one of the best teams in our varsity league. When I played in a co-ed soccer league with them, things got heated and there was a lot of pushing and shoving and I accidentally on purpose used the ball to nail a player in his crowned jewels. He was extremely arrogant-- as was the rest of the team-- and kept shouting at his teammates for "letting a girl take the ball" from him. I was the only girl on the field, so obvi he was talking about me. When I look back at moments like these, I never remember what could have possibly gone through my mind to make me partake in these hard knock struggles. But then in the next game, it all comes back.

So let me learn you a story.

I'm a Big for my team; I play 4. I'm pretty tall (about 5'9'') so it's not too hard to reach the basket for a shot or a rebound. Today, some girl kept fouling me in the key. It wasn't an accidental push, which I understand is a common thing. This was an angered act of violencia. Outright, my friends. You best believe I shoved that mofo back.

Things went haywire when one of their players got 2 shots. I was at the block, ready to box a bitch out, and:

a. the player next to me kept wacking my boob
b. she went for it before it hit the damn rim
c. I grabbed the rebound and she slapped my hands to try to get it
d. I gripped it and *PASSIVE* aggressively asked her to please not touch my hands bc excuse you ma'am but that is not allowed
e. she called me a crazy bitch
f. I started to dribble it out and I kid you not this chick grabbed my shirt for like 3 steps
g. I let out the most angry yell I think I've ever done. Like picture a bear who runs out of Charmin and has to use Kroger brand toilet paper instead.

Anyway, I'm aggressive. Especially in basketball. I use my anger to grab the ball out of their cold blooded hands, and when the ref blows the whistle sometimes I can't help but slam the ball onto the ground and walk away like I just set off a bomb. After the annoying girl made a shot, I slapped the ball away and it hit this one scary girl in the head and I just ran away and laughed at myself. This still perplexes me. I am so serene in person, and yet in that game I felt entirely inclined to punch someone in the gut.

One day, we will beat you, Lovidence.

Me tbh

Writing

So, I have always been a fan of writing. I support the publication of people's writing because I of course love reading as well. I write a lot. I used to write short stories about people at parties who get interrupted by monsters in carriages. Now I write about myself. I suppose it could be considered to be a rather narcissistic thing to do, but as a 16 year old, I figure that writing from a stream of consciousness is the best way to learn about myself. With that being said, I would like to say that I have always kept my writing private. In a society where people's lives are often observed and judged by other random people (who, in fact, often have no right to do so, although admittedly we all do it anyway), our thoughts are the only thing that, unless expressed publicly, may not be judged. Sometimes a piece of paper can be my best friend. 

On the other hand, I love gaining access to people's minds. People fascinate me. I spent a good part of my life in silence, scoping out the world and its crazy inhabitants. But that's just it; we are all crazy whether we show it or not. And when we don't, only our own intellect can know. So, sometimes people put their understandings of themselves on paper. If we are lucky we can become a member of their introspection. Someone once told me that it's like a journey in time with another soul. A sacred fellowship. It's a speechless communion. 

This is why I love writing.